Do you stare into the sky anymore?
The clouds, the Color, the surreal Movement.
Its' intoxicating.
Stare for me...

Why do I feel safe with rain now?
Safer than before.
Rain.

Same rain, pouring rain.
It is forever the same rain to me.
Raining. mahbousa ila il nahr.

Raining my heart's desire.
Raining.
Feeling safer than before.

-Raining
Tenebrae Darkamist

An open life,
Open to the stars,
Can be gazed down upon, Down to the heart.

My wind that echoes,
My voice along the desert plains of my home.

A sweetness that sweeps me at my feet,
Of that open kiss,
That swept us past our sussuration into an open,
Dream.

Her hair in her eyes,
Staring straight at me.

Closed, perchance,
As I came closer to her.
My lips pursued hers,
A kiss introved us together.

And the spell vanished.
The dream off with the rest of the winds.
The winds of the desert.

A desert kiss
-Tenebrae Darkamist

Do you understand?

The way of life.
The mood of our souls.
The ecstasy,
The anger,
The sadness,
The keys to our heart.

Do you understand?




Do you understand?
-Tenebrae Darkamist

The incentive that drove me on was destroyed,
Scattered among the raindrops, it first had to draw upon me to a desolate end.

Standing in the mud,
Overcast skies brewing over me,
My dingie broken up to my side,
My lips partched, welcomed the rain,
But the sourness was all that I could feel.

The plain barren,
My eyes looked as far as it could reach,
With groping hands, it spired and turnered,
Yet I could see nothing but,
Dark shapes gliding and sputtering,
Yet one came close to me.
Feeling it's barren breath fall down upon me,
I shuddered.
Another came up to my right, another came up to my left.

They stared for a moment, then glided away.
I struggled in the mud,
Moving away.
Sunken forehead,
Partched mouth,
I struggled on until I stopped.

The overcast skies stopped growing, trembling from a sun.
Peircing the clouds.
Sunlight streaming.
All I could do was salute it,
And fall.

The light moved on,
Didn't even stop.
The shapes glided even closer,
Smiles playing on their lips.

I wanted to scream,
I wanted to shout,
But a heaviness was heaving at my heart.

Mud splaying all over my skin,
I struggled against their grip.
They held their grip on,
They waited till I could not move,
Then they went ahead and feasted,
untill their heart's suffice.



Death Fields
-Tenebrae Darkamist

Tears streaming down her face,
Watching as her world is destroyed.
A fear was growing inside of her,
The Fear of bombs,
The Fear of the guns,
The Fear of the men who fought for a manipulative object,
Oil.

Wind flapping her gown,
She let a dove drop,
A white dove,
A dove.

And all she could do is watch,
With the tears of a child.



Tears of a Child
-Tenebrae Darkamist

When we travel,
We do not,
Think about,
What we are doing,
When we get back.

We leave it to
God to decide for us,
Our future.

Are we truly in control of our lives?
Do we want to be?

Think about it,
Just think about it.

We do not want to be in control,
The power is horrendous.

Who wants to know when,
We die,
Is it really worth knowing?

Think about it,
Just think about it?



Control
-Tenebrae Darkamist

She looked bright in the,
afternoon sun.
Too bright for my eyes,
Good enough for my words.

An endless stymray of words,
came out of my mouth.
Poetic incense,
Lovely terms,
All used for the same person.

She giggled and,
stepped closer.
I could smell the perfume of her hair.

Whiteness is her color,
A healthy haze for her hair.
I do not care so,
I can love her anyhow, anywhere.

I stroked her cheek,
with a gentle hand,
Then cupped her chin.

Her eyes closing somewhat,
I bent in, Stopped,
and stared at the rest of her face.

Wind sparkling her hair,
blowing it in front of her eyes.
'Perfect' I thought, and continued on.

My head next to hers,
Her mouth opening slightly,
I kissed the top of her head, tasting salt.
She looked up, dissapointed, and saw me smile.

Smiling, I bent down and kissed her again.


Her
-Tenebrae Darkamist

Lips of a gentle weather, so silent, so soft,
uttered those words that torn away my heart.
Left me in my midst,
puzzlement, bewilderment, they all swirled inside of me.
And it was all I could do to catch one of them and read it.
Instead of an answer,
Came a reason.
A reason why,
More the callious than myself.

Why did it have to happen,
Why is it like this?
Am I the disease,
or just the victim?

And as I waited for the answer,
I revertabated myself.
First came the anger and then the sadness.
And I wanted to show my control,
Despite all this,
As best as I could.

I am not the Disease nor the Victim,
Yet stuck inbetween.
Let my thoughts hold the key to my resentment, let me dwell in it as short as I could.



Words that question
-Tenebrae Darkamist

Time after time,
Day after Day.
I can not run,
I can not wait.

My will is somewhere else,
I, myself, left alone in the dark.
Can you help me?
Is this for naught?

My heart aching,
With pains surging forth.
Do I really need to wait longer?
Must I first come forth?

Tears staining my face,
I look across,
Seeing my race.

Can you blame me for who I am?
Can you blame me if I am who I am?
A separate hatred, built for me.
My heart is not as Iron as others said would it be.

I absolve the remarks among my past,
Is this what I want?
Is this who I am?

Kissing my lips with my tounge,
Feeling the moisture run down to my lungs.
Eyes opening, shuddering, afraid of the might.
Plunging it through my neck.

An ode to a bitter flame,
A flame of hate,
The flame of being different.
This is not the life I choose to be.
This is the life I am given.

Eyes staring out unto the ceiling,
Watching it pass by my eyes.
Line after line, space after line.
Darkness reaching out to the corners of my eye.

The doctor neared me, a wet eye I looking at me.
I asked for a paper, a pen, with the last breath I could breathe.
The were stunned at my presence, My urge for one last word.
I ran my hand over my face,
Darkness opaciting my eyes.
Blindness flooded me,
A paper and pen was thrust into my hand.
I wrote on the paper one last wish.
And fainted as I never have.

5- minutes later, the doctor lifted my hand,
Took out the paper,
And read it, read it to his heart,
To his soul,
Read the ode that made me differ and die.
He read the paper,
And collapsed it in my hand.
And swore to end this type of thing.
But in the end, he never had.


An Ode to a bitter flame
-Tenebrae Darkamist

What is worst about living, is living when your dead.
Living without a soul.
Living without a reason.
Dead with money-made friends.
Dead with obscure pleasures.
Dead with all things that would make you feel dead,
But you never are in the end.



Living when dead
-Tenebrae Darkamist

I give it a C-.

Searing through my chest,
Pain soared, graveled,
Groaned.

Panting hard,
I beat my legs against the ground,
Urging,
Forcing myself to move faster and faster.

After each step I took, earth clods were thrown up in the air,
After each step I took, my tears,
Mingled with the rain.

Wind flapping at my clothing, shouting, smacking my back until the pain was,
Unbearable.

Rain was pelting me like,
Bullets.

Passed an onlooker,
An enemy to silence.
Shouting,
Discouraging me.
Run I still do.

Tripped,
I fell,
I kissed the ground.

Blood flowing freely.
Forcing myself to stand straight,
I was forced back down on the ground.
Offender to justice,
My teammate, still running away.
Swore under my breath
Stood up again.

Standing up.
Pure hatred filling my heart.
Blood pumping through my veins.
Crouching down one more time,
Setting off again, pain soaring through my bones.

Running. Crying. Challenged.
All emotions in their wake.
Flying.

Ruthless now, left everyone in the dust.
Then came the end. Right in front of me.
Remainder of energy bursting,
Twenty meters left.
Mile and a half almost complete.
Then it struck.

Asthma.
Struggled on my feet.

Cheering pulling me on.

Ran.

Finished.

‘7 min. 37 sec.’
The voice came out of nowhere.
Grinned foolishly.




Running
-Tenebrae Darkamist

Life is sweet and yet it will get even sweeter.
With one kiss, listen to the promise that will be given.
What is a life without that seducing excitement,
Let me show you what life is about.

Please take in this open lie,
Watch what it will give you.
For this is an open lie,
Take it if you must.

I am sorry if it hurt you,
For it seems as if it must.
For who knows of the little things a single kiss
Will bring.

Bloody feuds and misfortune on
One side.
Short lived happiness and ecstasy
On the other.

Beware of this lie,
Subtle it may seem.
For a bloody misfortune it will bring.

This is an open lie.
The one promise that a single,
Kiss will give.





The Open Lie
-Tenebrae Darkamist

Trees flaying about in the cold winds,
Turning, Scything,
Flapping their arms in fear.
Trees that then,
Lurch, jump,
Out of the ground.

The seas of oats,
Rippling, waving,
Forever moving.
Going out in schools,
Always so polite when I pass by,
Bobbing their heads in greeting.

I thought once that I have seen the Leviathan,
Effortlessly moving.
Paddling amongst the clouds.
I will remember to ask it,
If I see it,
What the clouds taste like.

Then came the moon,
Full at night.
I ask about the moon maiden that lives there,
And ask her how she is faring.

My stairway to the heavens,
Is upon a skeleton of a
Great old dragon.
I remember meeting a dragon,
Moving through the caves of France.
Kindly old beast,
Must be kind to dragons, for then you have kindness upon you.

I remember watching a war.
Beasts fighting, with stuffed dummies that,
Would rather run than fight.

I watched the sunset set
With a lovers on one side of me,
A crier on the other.
Then before the sun set,
I waved goodnight.
And could have sworn that it did the same.

I remember waking up in the morning,
From a pleasant dream.
And then all around me,
Clouds began to form.
Taking me sky high.
Then letting me go.
I survived of course.
Or maybe I am now dead.
A clone, a recollection of images.
Not exactly a happy thought.




Weird Dreams
By
Tenebrae Darkamist
Written February 16, 2004

These are really old poems of mine, some 2004, some 2002... I am 16 now, so think about it. I also have a -load stack of poems somewhere, when I have the chance, maybe I will put it up... *shrug*

EDIT: Watch your language. ~Shiri~

To answer your question - yes, I do stare the sky sometimes. It's quite nice really.

Then you may love life to it's full potential...

How mysterious.

I like how you keep us in suspense.

*grabs you by the collar* Write more!