Found these online, wanted to share them. Enjoy

CHUCK NORRIS FACTS:
01 Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
02 Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.
03 Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
04 If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.
05 Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
06 When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
07 Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.
08 Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.
09 They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.
10 A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.
11.There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
12.Chuck Norris knows where Carmen Sandiego is.
13.Chuck Norris is what Willis was talking about.
14.If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
15.Multiple people have died from Chuck Norris giving them the finger.
16.Chuck Norris once tried to wear glasses. The result was him seeing around the world to the point where he was looking at the back of his own head.
17.If Chuck Norris is late, time better slow the down.
18.Chuck Norris can touch MC Hammer.
19.Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King, and got one.
20.There is no such thing as tornadoes. Chuck Norris just hates trailer parks.
21.Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of “beard”. Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus’ obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.
22.If paper beats rock, rock beats scissors, and scissors beats paper, what beats all 3 at the same time? Answer: Chuck Norris.
23.Chuck Norris has never blinked in his entire life. Never.
24.If Superman and The Flash were to race to the edge of space you know who would win? Chuck Norris.
25.Chuck Norris invented water.
26.When you open a can of whoop-ass, Chuck Norris jumps out.
27.Chuck Norris can piss into gale force winds.
28.Chuck Norris got a perfect score on his SAT's, simply by writing Chuck Norris for every answer.
29.Aliens do exist. They're just waiting for Chuck Norris to die before they attack.
30.Chuck Norris invented black. In fact, he invented the entire spectrum of visible light. Except pink. Tom Cruise invented pink.
31.Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
32.Nobody doesn't like Sara Lee. Except Chuck Norris.
33.Chuck Norris does not "style" his hair. It lays perfectly in place out of sheer terror.
34.The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed misserably.
35.Chuck Norris once broke the land speed record on a bicycle that was missing its chain and the back tire.
36.Chuck Norris makes Narsrim look like a whiny little faeling.

<3

Did Verithrax cause this....

Ummm no, I was thinking of a shirt I saw and went online to find more Chuck Norris stuff.

Thats a freaky coicindence....

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Incidently, I've got a WoW mod somewhere around here. You type /chuck (channel number/raid/guild/party/say) and it spits a random Chuck fact into that channel

See? I didn't cause this, it's a coincidence. Or not. It's a display of Chuck Norris' awesome power.

Verithrax doesn't make the best robes in the universe. He makes the second best robes in the universe. The best robes in the universe are woven from Chuck Norris' beard.

Narsrim aquired his uber-griefing powers afer a five-minute encounter with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris' left testicle doubles as a transplanar cubix

SO SICK OF THIS CRAP!!!!!!!!!!!!! rant over

Kethuru is actually the result of Chuck Norris roundhouse kicking Yudhe.

I like this one. There is no such thing as evolution...only animals Chuck norris allows to live.

Chuck Norris isn't known by me. Therefore he can't be that special.

well that's bad because:

He wishes Anyway seriously, who the fsk is Chuck Norris?

I saw 10 minutes of a chuck norris film once.. then I changed channel.

Chuck Norris had a show called Walker, Texas Ranger. It was one of the stupidest, cheesiest shows ever. He was a cowboy ninja. Interestingly enough, it's pretty hard to tear yourself away from watching it. You can change the channel because, that's right, Chuck Norris is watching. He's like Santa. A non-fat cowboy ninja Santa that doesn't give presents. On second thought, he's nothing like Santa.

I've never seen a Chuck Norris movie in my life. I still find the quotes funny though.

If you stay up until 5 am EST, you get the pleasure of watching the Chuck Norris cartoon on Cartoon Network.

Also,

Chuck Norris CAN believe it's not butter.
Chuck Norris puts the FUN in Funeral.
Chuck Norris did in fact, build Rome in a day.


Edited to add the channel.