The Eternal Quitter

Just comes on the forum to let everyone know he's quitting for good and to spend a dozen paragraphs explaining why. Then does it again three months later.

Sample Quote: "For real, this time."

Punishment: Forced to actually quit.

The Majority Stockholder

Seems to believe that $15 a month buys you a seat on the board of directors. Doesn't realize that a hundred thousand other people are ponying up the same amount.

Sample Quote: "I've e-mailed the developers several times telling them that Fire Paladins should have the axe-throwing skill. They haven't changed it, but they're still taking my money!."

Punishment: Forced to work customer service for an online game company.

Q: How many forum members does it takes to change a light bulb?

* 1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed
* 14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently
* 7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs
* 1 to move it to the Lighting section
* 2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section
* 7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs
* 5 to flame the spell checkers
* 3 to correct spelling/grammar flames
* 6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid
* 3 standards zealots to point out that light bulbs have been deprecated in the LB 2.1 spec
* 1 to call upon everybody to ignore this deprecation
* 2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"
* 15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct
* 19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum
* 11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum
* 36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty
* 7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs
* 4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's
* 3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group
* 13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"
* 5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy
* 4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"
* 13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"
* 1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again.