Facts about Ixion

by Verithrax

Back to The Funnies.

Verithrax2006-12-14 00:42:55
There is a perception, currently, that Ixion's overpoweredness stems exclusively from his broadswords. I plan to demonstrate that this is not true.

Ixion's tears cure Astral insanity. Too bad he never cries.

Ixion once turned a newbie shortsword into a prenerf rapier... with his forehead.

When Ixion walks, 'Little Green Bag' plays in the background. All the time.

Ixion can recharge a power node to 100%, just by staring at it with his eye

If Ixion forges a shield, it can't be broken with shieldbash.

There are no unreleased skills. Only moves Ixion hasn't taught to anyone yet.

Ixion trimmed his beard once - The fallen hairs joined together, gained life, and became Amaru.

Ixion never has to face someone wearing armour - He can squeeze a knight out of full plate with his bare hands.

Ixion goes hunting in Aetherspace - Without a ship.

Ixion once swung his broadsword so hard on someone that his head broke the speed of light, went back in time, and knocked out Kethuru during the Elder Wars.

Ixion doesn't buy leather - He swings his broadswords at cows and the leather comes off pre-tanned.

Feel free to add your own.
Hazar2006-12-14 00:44:41
Ixion doesn't win battles. Battles win Ixion.
Ildaudid2006-12-14 00:47:10
And Ixion doesn't have OP swords anymore....

Now continue to stroke my father's ego some more. tongue.gif
Diamondais2006-12-14 00:49:16
QUOTE(Ildaudid @ Dec 13 2006, 07:47 PM) 362935

And Ixion doesn't have OP swords anymore....

Now continue to stroke my father's ego some more. tongue.gif

Ixion doesnt have an ego, the ego has an Ixion!


quickexit.gif

(Hm.. maybe thats why good people have big egos? laugh.gif )
Verithrax2006-12-14 00:51:38
Ixion once had a 'Who has more testicles' competition with Narsrim, and won by five... and a half.
Unknown2006-12-14 00:58:17
It's times like this I really wish I'd been around long enough not to be left wondering...Who the censor.gif is Ixion?? I'm often left without a clue...tongue.gif

Funny stuff though!
Ashteru2006-12-14 01:08:51
QUOTE(Jessa @ Dec 14 2006, 01:58 AM) 362940

It's times like this I really wish I'd been around long enough not to be left wondering...Who the censor.gif is Ixion?? I'm often left without a clue...tongue.gif

Funny stuff though!

Someone nearly as good looking and skillful as I am.
Ildaudid2006-12-14 01:09:21
QUOTE(Jessa @ Dec 13 2006, 07:58 PM) 362940

It's times like this I really wish I'd been around long enough not to be left wondering...Who the censor.gif is Ixion?? I'm often left without a clue...tongue.gif

Funny stuff though!


Hehe, he is around alot.... just pray you don't meet him if you are a celestian. If you are in Magnagora, well say hi to him sometime, but check for him on cwho since he wont show up on qwho. smile.gif
Verithrax2006-12-14 01:34:59
Those are from the IRC goons:

Facts about Other Lusternians:

Ialie can touch MC Hammer.

Lowe can slam a revolving door.

Do you know why Baskin Robbins only has 31 flavors? Because Verithrax doesn't like Fudge Ripple.

Verithrax doesn't backstab people - He looks at them a certain way and a knife wound appears on their back.

When Arix says "More cowbell", he MEANS it.

When Verithrax gets pissed at someone, 'Stuck in the Middle With You' starts playing on the background.


Verithrax owns that hotel in the astral plane.

Verithrax knows how to make your private designs.

Verithrax toppled a chess board....and got a check mate.

Where your eyes don't go, Verithrax waves his broomstick arms and does a parody of each unconscious thing you do.

Richter pays Celest's water bill every year - Because he can.

The Mother Roc never grabs Arix to feed to her babies, because they aren't of legal age.

Arix knocked-up Elohora.

Arix was born with a miniature bottle of Jack Daniel's in his mouth.

Arix can turn wheat into moonshine with the force of his bare fists.

Touching Arix gives you alchohol poisoning.
Verithrax2006-12-14 02:03:44
Richter doesn't need to hire assassins - He pays people to die.

The fates try to cut Verithrax's thread now and again, but always end up cutting the thread of a forest-dweller instead.

Joli can play the world's smallest violin, just for Glomdoring.

Ixion doesn't need condoms - He just has sex whilst wearing full plate.

Verithrax is so subtle, he has had sex with women from across the room.

Night stops running for some of Arix's moonshine.

Nothing gets between Verithrax and his Splendours.

Sun caught Night because Ialie set him up.

Verithrax can kill someone just by uttering the right insult - From up to three planes away.

Kethuru stays behind the seals willingly, because of Ixion.

Whenever Verithrax kills someone, the witnesses all learn something. This is so he can claim he did it for educational purposes.

When Ixion was appionted to ascend into Vernal God-hood, there was a universal,"You've got to be kidding me...." in the heavens.

Verithrax has developed an immunity to zapping.

Verithrax can protect a building from lightning strike simply by standing at a safe distance and attracting the lightning himself.

Ixion doesn't reach level 100 because being a Demigod would halve his powers.

Lyreth lost his voice because Ixion got ahold of him.

(Or maybe...)

Lyreth lost his voice after trying to argue with Daganev for forty days and forty nights.

Daganev can stop TK daggers - with his skull.
Shamarah2006-12-14 02:05:01
#SUB {Chuck Norris} {Ixion}
#SHOW @http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
Volgrant2006-12-14 02:20:39
/hijack on

Your sig quote is awesome Veri. I salute you.

/hijack off
Joli2006-12-14 02:28:49
QUOTE(Verithrax @ Dec 13 2006, 10:03 PM) 362970

Verithrax is so subtle, he has had sex with women from across the room.



So that's what that was.
Richter2006-12-14 02:46:48
God, I know, right? I wasn't sure what it was either.
Hazar2006-12-14 03:01:29
Ildaudid doesn't read books. He just stares them down until they give him the information he needs

Shayle doesn't play god. Playing is for children.
Verithrax2006-12-14 03:10:57
Psh. Mine are better because they're Lusternia-related.

Except the ones some IRC goons did, anyway.
Hazar2006-12-14 03:12:49
Verithrax makes Keph look like Isune.
Verithrax2006-12-14 03:14:05
...Oi.
Hazar2006-12-14 03:26:51
You asked for it.
Genevieve2006-12-14 03:27:24
Speaking of people in Aetherspace without a ship, I remember when that bug happened to Narsrim. That had to have been confusing as hell. I believe he had to heartstop to get back.