Better yet, "my goldfish ate my homework".

Or an adaptation on my dog ate my homework. Get your paper, write as much as you need, copy and paste random crap if needed, it's the quantity that counts. Go down to the local butcher. Ask them to drop the paper in some bloody liquid, make sure the ink runs, stained, generally unreadable. They'll have some somewhere, always do. Take paper, put in plastic bag (unless you're not too squeamish). Give plastic bag to teacher saying "My dog ate my homework, but I know how much you hate late assessment. You now owe me a new dog."

Or my favrite trick... (If any of you are in the Youth Ministry at my church, tell Minie what I am about to say and you will be sitting in the back left seat of the bus with that weird smell we can't find...) Walk into class, with a drink, (coffee works best) and as you start to stand up, knock it over. Now go, "Ma'am/sir, I could give this to you now, but I would much rather give you a clean copy, can I bring you a new one tomorrow?"

You just earned an extra day.

This reminds me of a story I heard. This radio dj was talking about this kid he went to high school with. They had this 10 page paper due and this kid showed up before the teacher arrived with a perfectly done cover-sheet stapled to ten blank sheets of paper. He then tore the coversheet off in such a way that the corner of each of the ten pages was still attached and placed it at the bottom of the stack of papers that were being turned in on the teacher's desk. When the teacher came in she put the stack in a folder and put it in her bag and started the class. The next day, the teacher called the kid up and showed him the cover-sheet. The kid flipped out about how could the teacher have lost his paper. He'd done so much work! Someone had stolen his paper obviously! He wanted an investigation! He hadn't done all that work for nothing! and so on. The teacher wound up giving the kid a B on the paper...which he never actually turned in and never actually did just because of the fuss he kicked up.

I personally could never pull something like that off cause I'd flake out halfway through and the teacher would see through it.

Bah, that is a standard move... its actually quite ametuerish, because he depended on the teacher not going through them. Not turning in something is easier to BS your way out of then that move...

The trick is to talk to friends about problems in your life, make sure your teacher thinks your life at home is tough, rather it is or not... you will normally be favoured in grades, and you have a build up if an emergancy does happen and you need a few extra days.

(I do not condone the use of my BSing methods to foster procrastination, they are for emergency use only... and be careful, teachers are not dumb, they can catch onto BSing faster the BS brings in flies. A trick may work once, but it WILL NOT work twice.)

((Should not be giving this information out...))

Hell, with my two goldfish, Dodabmahobjob and Asadafagahas, I wouldn't be at all surpised...they'd be pyschopathic murderers if they had the digits to use firearms *twitch*

I agree! Though in my case its up til 4am playing when I have to be at work at 7am the next morning and should be studying for finals in the mean time. Speaking of which.....I really -should- be studying so I dont go ruin my GPA...