How NOT to cure lower back pain.

by Unknown

Back to The Funnies.

Unknown2005-02-23 06:29:33
(Alger likes to insult Guido for his ruined and horrible appearance. I figure it's been long enough since the Serenwilde had a Guido Field Day... I could have recovered a bit...

He is a burly tae'dae and is walking the long road to recovery. The great bear
is missing patches of fur, and most of what remains is grayish-brown and dying.
The first signs of a newer, healthier coat are appearing, however, and shiny
black bristles cover much of his body. He holds his entire nine feet of height
up proudly, back straight, but every step seems to send a small shiver of pain
up his spine. Underneath his healing coat can be seen the marks of countless
wounds, although most of them have now faded away into soft pink scar tissue.
The heavy muscle of his trunk-like limbs is stiff a feeble. His eyes are cold
and hard, his toothy snout more often that not turned up in a naturally
sarcastic grin.
)


You nod your head at yourself.

You say to Alger, "There, look for yourself, Sir. I think i've improved."

Alger looks about himself, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

Alger peers at you unscrupulously.

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "Still scrawny."

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "And walk properly!"

You mutter discontentedly.

You say, "I'm doing as well as I can manage. I can either walk a mile hunched
or ten feet straight and then collapse from back pain."

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "Pain?"

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "PAIN?"

You have emoted: Guido reaches back and rubs his lower back with his paw,
frowning.

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "Pain's good for you, soldier."

You say, "It starts to spasm; there's something wrong with the nerves."

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "Psh."

You say, "Just like when you sever any opponent's nerve with your blade, or
have it cut yourself."

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "Nothing a few kombu wouldnt fix."

You say, "I'm afraid going in there and shoving it between my spinal plates
would end in a rather dramatic fashion. I've begun looking for a more
experienced healer to take a look in there, but I don't trust those who
practice the art."

Daganev steps out of the Megalith of Doom, trailing sparkling motes of light.

You have emoted: Guido mutters something about damn dirty Moondancers and
Celestians.

Alger looks about himself, rubbing his chin thoughtfully.

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "I think Dag could fix it."

Daganev snaps his fingers.

Daganev peers about himself unscrupulously.

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says to Daganev, "Dag."

You crease your brow in a frown.

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says to Daganev, "This soldier won't walk
straight."

First Death Sergeant, Daganev Treeripper, Shaper of Steel pounds his chest.

First Death Sergeant, Daganev Treeripper, Shaper of Steel says, "Which one?"

Daganev points accusingly at you.

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says to Daganev, "Says he has back pains,
mind giving it one of those back stretching hugs."

Daganev raises an eyebrow questioningly.

You say to Daganev, "It's the nerves in my lower spine. Too many beatings must
have twisted them all up, or whatever it is that nerves do when they get..."

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "Aye that one."

You blink incredulously at Alger.

Daganev nods his head emphatically.

First Death Sergeant, Daganev Treeripper, Shaper of Steel says, "Turn around."



First Death Sergeant, Daganev Treeripper, Shaper of Steel gets up behind Guido.

Daganev runs up to you and squeezes you in a painful, bone-crushing bearhug.

Sparkling motes of bright light surround the Megalith of Doom.

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "There now you should start walking
straight."

Alger gives kombu seaweed to you.

Alger nods his head at himself.

First Death Sergeant, Daganev Treeripper, Shaper of Steel says, "If not me can
fix yer legs."

You have emoted: Guido stumbles forward, then back, his spine cracking slightly
as he straightens.

You say, "That's better. In a way."

You eat kombu seaweed.

You say, "Now it hurts to bend..."

Daganev leaves to the east.

Alger shakes his head.

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "Remind me to put you on the front line
next time."

First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "Might as well put you out of your
misery."

You say, "Yes. Sir."

You incline your head politely to Alger.
Shinza2005-02-23 07:36:51
Awww! I love the way you guys RP smile.gif
Unknown2005-02-23 21:38:22
That is pretty hysterical, and some darn good roleplaying, too!
Richter2005-02-23 21:44:55
You got someone to arr pee with you? *boggle*

Was it Divine-sanctioned? *boggle*
Aajen2005-02-23 23:06:03
I love how Alger does his Drill Sergreant role, novices never know what hits them.
Jalain2005-02-24 23:28:42
Oh gods.. That almost makes me wish I were in that guild. But then I remember that Merloch made Jalain hate guilds.
Daganev2005-02-24 23:42:14
I randomly walked into the room, and walked out.

I was hoping he wanted me to "fix" his legs so I could pummel them into stumps. Oh well.
Jalain2005-02-25 04:03:46
Nasty nasty bear on bear action
Daganev2005-02-25 04:04:34
pervs, all of you
Typhus2005-03-01 18:46:24
QUOTE
First Death Sergeant, Daganev Treeripper, Shaper of Steel says, "Turn around."



We are pervs?
Daganev2005-03-01 20:35:57
um yeah.

Its kinda of hard to crack someone's back when they are facing you.
Summer2005-03-01 20:55:21
I'd have thought it would be easier with them facing you unless they were bent backwards whistling.gif
Unknown2005-03-02 22:28:40
QUOTE(Guido Flagg @ Feb 23 2005, 06:29 AM)
First Sergeant Alger D'Tylmirande says, "Pain's good for you, soldier."
57801



What does not kill me make me stronger*.




* Except in the case of muscle removal.
Daganev2005-03-03 00:48:31
Eh, whenver I get my back cracked or crack someone elses I have thier back to me, so I can lift them backwards and crack the spine better. That on walking on people I thougth were the two most popular ways of doing it. Having them face you wouldn't bend their spine in the wrong direction enough.
Lyren2005-03-03 11:02:24
Hm, I always thought the people stood back-to-back, and leaned over together in one direction at a time? Maybe I'm remembering wrong, it sounds painful looking at it typed out.
Summer2005-03-03 11:29:56
You mean you do it irl? blink.gif Sure hope no one ends up in a hospital.

Never knew that exercise was considered back cracking.
Shiri2005-03-03 19:20:11
You can't really bearhug someone back-to-back, can you? blink.gif
Daganev2005-03-03 19:26:06
I do it all the time with my friends... no hospitals
Typhus2005-03-07 19:34:20
Heh, and don't you think to the casual person passing by it would look... Akward?
Daganev2005-03-07 19:47:50