Bonus Question: Is Hell exothermic (gives off heat) or endothermic (absorbs heat)?

Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law (gas cools off when
it expands and heats up when it is compressed) or some variant. One student, however,
wrote the following:

"First, we need to know how the mass of Hell is changing in time. So we need to know
the rate that souls are moving into Hell and the rate they are leaving. I think that
we can safely assume that once a soul gets to Hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no
souls are leaving.

As for how many souls are entering Hell, let's look at the different religions that
exist in the world today. Most of these religions state that if you are not a member
of their religion, you will go to Hell. Since there is more than one of these religions
and since people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all
souls go to Hell.

With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in Hell to
increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change of the volume in Hell
because Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in Hell
to stay the same, the volume of Hell has to expand proportionately as souls are added.
This gives two possibilities:

1) If Hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter Hell,
then the temperature and pressure in Hell will increase until all Hell breaks loose.

2) If Hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in Hell, then
the temperature and pressure will drop until Hell freezes over. So which is it?

If we accept the postulate given to me by Teresa during my Freshman year, "...that
it will be a cold day in Hell before I sleep with you", and take into account the
fact that I still have not succeeded in having an affair with her, then #2 above
cannot be true, and thus I am sure that Hell is exothermic and will not freeze over."

THIS STUDENT RECEIVED THE ONLY "A".

Ohhh.. I love it!

what Soll said (cept for the edit part)

To quote an even older joke, which I've also Heard.

I've heard that joke before, still hilarious though

...I'm so going to ask that question when I become an english teacher.

That's so awesome. -stares in awe-

That's awesome. Kind of an odd question to ask, but the answers given by students would probably tell a lot about each person's upbringing. It would be interesting to see those other answers I think. As for that one, that person certainly seems to know what they're talking about

Reminds me of this old email sent to me.

Heh that's a cool essay...

However, just to rain on everybody's parade:

The illusion of Hell of burning souls and eternal fire is false. It is a misinterpretation by hollywood to explain the true nature of Hell to the ignorant.

Hell is the absence of God's grace. It is the place where God retracts all of His grace and compassion from you, for you have rejected Him on earth.

I learn stuff at Sunday School.

Hell is different depending on which sect of Christianity you follow.

I prefer Dante's icy Hell myself, if I have to pick one.

This is my favorite...

How Beer Makes You Smarter

One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm. and here's how it went:
Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first. This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members.

In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first.

In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers.

I dont suppose athiest opinions matter...

Nice try, but no

Kidaen become a mortal so I can marry You.

All that sarcasm is just sexy.

I do, as well. I would land within the Second Circle, the Lustful. Blown about in an eternal tempest are those whom lived solely for life's sensual pleasures, coming close to one's desires, before being torn apart by the howling winds of love corrupted - that which exists without the Spirit's most holy of presence.

I've also seen another version of the ending, something along the lines of "given the volume at which she was screaming my name last night, I must conclude the former is true, and thus Hell will surely break loose at any given time."

The one I heard had his teacher instead of the other person's name. The teacher had told him she wouldn't sleep with him unless hell froze over.

'Tis almost disturbing. Unless the teacher is young. Then it's not so bad. But still pretty disturbin'.

You people really don't want to know what all that makes me think of..