Alright... I've been out of college for like, months now, I had a job while in school, but it sucked and upon leaving school... A very bad day for me... I knew I needed a much better paying job of some sort or I was going to end up in debt up to my eyeballs for the rest of my life...

Its now been nearly a year, and still no new job. I recently found out why though, and thats why I'm posting this.

Every time I filled out a job interview, I was given one of those screwed up personality profiles and stuff that are ambiguous as all hell, and ask questions that can be looked at a dozen ways. Well, I'm horribly honest about myself... Like... To a fault, honest, so when the stupid thing asks "Have you ever lied?" What the hell am I going to say but, uh yeah! Who hasn't ever lied? Same thing for questions like, "Have you ever stolen something" Again, ambiguous as hell, and my poor honest self thinks of the times I've taken small things like pencils, and a stapler once, and never returned it... So of course, I say yes. So the test comes back and the results make it sound like I'm a chronic liar with tendency's toward thievery!!! I want to find who designs these tests and run through their offices shooting them with rubber bullets! (Dun wanna kill em... just maim and injure.)

I ask you, what is the point of these tests? If an honest person takes them, they are just going to teach the honest person that honesty is not what gets you hired, and to just lie. A liar takes em, and they'll get hired in a cynch... I'm just very sad that I've wasted nearly a year of my life because I'm too HONEST!!!!

Edited for language.

Yeah, I've only done one of those, and I'm a pretty good kid, so it was fine.

My friend however, took the same test, and failled miserably. Questions like: would you like to work here. Well... he answered honestly! Unfortunately, some of the questions were auto-fail.

Best advice, when doing some BS test like that, answer reasonably. Don't lie your rear off, but don't give bad answers either.

I hate those! I can't believe companies still issue tests like that. Like you can really tell how a person is from a 50-100 question quiz that repeats reworded questions. Half the people I talk to just answer the questions that they think the employer wants to hear anyway.

Not sure why you wouldn't. Are they going to interrigate your friends and find out that you lied to one a few years ago? Or take an inventory at your previous office and discover that there are 3 pens unaccounted for?

The one perk of my current job is that I still got hired even after saying to the interviewer, "I really don't want to work here, but it's money." That, and I can spout profanity at the machines when they break down and not get even looked at funny.

Those questions are total crap, they tell you nothing. You either get what you want to hear, and know nothing, or get what you don't want to hear, and they're screwed anyway.

I think the real purpose of those tests is about conformity, now that i think about it. They don't want real honesty, or trustworthiness or loyalty (IMO, that's what Interviews are for testing.)

What they test is conformity. They want to see if you'll 'get with the system' and say what they want you to say. A person willing to do exactly that will be willing to conform to what the company wants instead of going on outside factors (laziness, personal beliefs, 'issues'.. so on).

So it's less the fact that you DO lie, and more the fact that you KNOW they want you say 'no' and yet you do it anyway.

Also they look for inconsistency. If one question points at you being a 'born leader' and another points at you 'shying away from command' then they'll flag you then too. If you answer that you like people just once, make sure you NEVER say you like 'loner time', even if it makes sense.

Actually, the whole test is geared towards two things. One... key questions, things like, have you ever done drugs, etc...

Secondly, it tests your responses to see if you're fudging. The carefully worded questions are designed specifically to provide the average person with the ability to continue answering with the same answer. However, with someone that might be lying or fudging certain answers, they generally get caught up and answer one of the similar questions differently because of the rewording. It's all psychology in the end.

I'm curious why your trying to apply to companies that give you these tests after you have allready graduated.

The best jobs you get are the ones where its done through connections.

Um.. so stop it? Honestly, if you want a better/different job then you're going to have to your way in until you get where you want to be in the job or in life if you're just there for experience.

Honesty is great, yeah, but.. if you're going to sacrifice your livelihood for that then it simply isn't worth it.

Thats where our mad roleplaying skillz come in handy

Many people don't/won't/can't make those networked connections when classes are done, or else end up with connections that lead to nowhere. As such, they have nothing socialy that can give them the boost they need.

Even with that, though, you should be able to find a better job than that. Look into what you've found yourself doing well in your life (no throwing away traits: That includes the fact that every character you make in a Mud ends up taking care of novices, or causes you to work out quarterly reports for your potion shop), find places in your life where you've done it, then learn how to stick it into a resume or sell it at an interview.

Not easy, but it's better than going through that stupid test, and much MUCH better than what the job would probably offer to you.

Well, I found my really good current job without connections and without psi tests
It was more like my now boss saying "From programmer to programmer, your duties will be blablabla, the salary is this, you work from 10 to 19, and I pretty much like your resume, so I'll call you next tuesday. Any question?"
All interviews should be 15m interviews like that one.