The description isn't written by the character; it's written by the player. I think it should be written in an easy, relatively simple and concise style; I wish I could put proper paragraphs in mine so I could compartimentalize things, but my new description starts with a simple phrase that sums up the rest for the sake of convenience:

He is an ordinary human and stands tall and spindly, looking alertly down from a face covered in hawk-like features through deep blue, wide eyes. His height is exacerbated by the straight posture and raised chin he takes most of the time. Covered in the pale, faintly translucent skin of a pure-blooded human that avoids sunlight, his body is lanky and thin, frail and spindly; his arms are long and end in spider-like hands, bony and lightly veined. He has a writer's hands, delicate and unaccostumed to manual labour, with nails extending a little beyond his fingers. The nails are painstakingly clean and sharpened fiercely into bone-white triangles. His palms both show a long, jarred scar across their surface, crossed by four smaller, parallel ones; the markings are shallow, but visible. His face, generally alert and wide-eyed, is reminiscent of a hawk, a hooked nose complementing a sharp, raised chin. Faint lines are just beginning to crease through the smooth skin. His hair falls down to just below his shoulders, raven-black and somewhat unkempt, a scraggly, slightly tangled mess that would be smooth if not for its lack of attention. His mouth, a thin, nearly lipless slit cut in his face that opens to reveal a set of clear white teeth against an unnaturally black background, sits under his nose, and two eyes of a near-black deep blue that sparkle with a faint red glow. As he breathes softly, faint wisps of black smoke sporadically exhale from his nostrils.

True, but it its usage is to convey an impression of the character to us through text.
As such, I don't think it unreasonable if it also communicates subconciously, other aspects of the characters personality.

Otherwise, I tend to agree.
Oh, and nice description by the way... even if it is rather long

Descriptions are also supposed to be totally unrelated to the character's personality. I think it's better to keep the style concise and simple, so that the reader can draw his own conclusions; it also means that you don't force people to expect something from the character, letting them draw preconceptions from what the character looks like, just like they're supposed to.

That would be fine if there was a consistent style applied to writing descriptions.

The default is just to be clear, relatively consise, and detached, that is, you write it from a non-IC point of view.

Non-IC absolutely!

As for the rest... that would be nice.
I haven't seen too many clear consise descriptions.

Non-IC yes. Descriptions are written by the player. Of course, you shouldn't go totally OOC ("Her breasts jut out like the jet engines on a Boing 747") but you also should write it from a detached, neutral, non-player-character point of view.

I am so taking that. Spelling error and all.

Oh, I have several.

"Her body is sleek like the hood on a 1977 Cadillac"
"Her hair falls down over her shoulder like a black cascade of Coke"
"Her toenails are painted bright Ferrari red"
"Her skin is smooth like a neoprene vest"

Well, this is what I've come up with so far:I started off with Lady Viravian's description for Ferlas, but changed it a bit. I could barely visualise her before I started this, so that's always good, yes?

I know your Ava! xD

EDIT: gah Im an idiot typed the completly wrong site, egs cosmics by dan shive, thats grace

Wooo!

Shive!

Wow, haven't read that since I was like 15. O_o

SILENCE, HEATHEN!

Hey, I didn't say it was bad!

Its good :nod me:

Could some please critique this description? I wanted to emphasize the 'cold logic' of lucidians by explaining some of her traits, but it seems to interrupt the flow. Go ahead and tear it apart. Thanks in advance.

a crystalline lucidian and is shorter than the average female. Constructed from a multitude of elongated, flat planes, her translucent body allows her to absorb the regenerative powers of the sun. An opaque core of jadeite protects her inner organs. The same pale green jadeite also makes up her cranium. Crystal prisms grow from her head, the most prominent growing in three pyramidesque formations, the bases equidistant from one another. In addition to those at her elbows and knees, small knobs of crystal protrude from her hips and wrists. Her hands and forearms are larger than the normal humanoid. Her feet resemble hooves more than anything else. With no ankles, she is especially wary of losing her balance, cautiously looking before she takes a step.

I know it's true, but it's better to keep to form and not function.

Lucidians, generally speaking are both not transparent enough for people to see their insides (Thank Estarra for that) and probably don't have a human-like bone structure.

Lucidian aren't all regular and perfect; they're shaped much more randomly.

Should be 'her hands and forearms are larger than a normal humanoid's' but that's not the point. It's better to say that she is lanky or long-armed; phrasing it this way makes it seem like it's a racial characteristic.

Lucidian have normal humanoid-like feet; that last phrase is bad because it internal action. 'She walks warily and cautiously before taking a step' would be better, but still bad; better to ignore it completely. She should have ankles anyway.

Thanks Verithrax. It really helped.
*goes off to edit*