10 things men don't know about women

by Joli

Back to The Funnies.

Unknown2006-04-29 21:22:32
Fun Facts about Men

1. Men aren't slaves.

2. Men don't notice small things. Heck, we don't notice big things

3. Men aren't psychic. If you have a problem say "I HAVE A PROBLEM"

4. Men are not Women

5. Men ARE NOT Women

6. Men are simpler, so don't complicate our lives

7. Men don't think(Most of the time), they act where their little things order

8. Men are used to joking around, women should lighten up

9. Men Love women in a different manner than women love men.

10. Men are the opposite of Women, if you don't like them, maybe you should either deal with it or play for the other team.
Acrune2006-04-29 21:26:12
QUOTE(Corinthian @ Apr 29 2006, 05:22 PM) 283766

Fun Facts about Men

1. Men aren't slaves.

2. Men don't notice small things. Heck, we don't notice big things

3. Men aren't psychic. If you have a problem say "I HAVE A PROBLEM"

4. Men are not Women

5. Men ARE NOT Women

6. Men are simpler, so don't complicate our lives

7. Men don't think(Most of the time), they act where their little things order

8. Men are used to joking around, women should lighten up

9. Men Love women in a different manner than women love men.

10. Men are the opposite of Women, if you don't like them, maybe you should either deal with it or play for the other team.


clap_1.gif
Unknown2006-04-29 21:28:46
And it should be stressed out that MEN ARE NOT SLAVES OF WOMEN mad.gif


And because I don't want to double post:

In my opinion, tomboy girls are the best. Those are my ideal partner for life. "Sugar, spice and everything nice" girls are so, ugh... I try to avoid.

Also, if a guy acts like a 7 year old when he's with you, you are set with a guy that likes you a lot. Men are children and will never change. If your man doesn't act like a kid with you, something's wrong.
Manjanaia2006-04-29 21:48:19
QUOTE(Penelope @ Apr 29 2006, 08:00 PM) 283715

Should add to this that women don't like men trying to be sarcastic and funny but only come off sounding like an censor.gif hole.


Maybe we should add to our list that we don't like when women make their own faults out to be their man's fault.
Acrune2006-04-29 21:52:08
QUOTE(Corinthian @ Apr 29 2006, 05:28 PM) 283771

In my opinion, tomboy girls are the best. Those are my ideal partner for life. "Sugar, spice and everything nice" girls are so, ugh... I try to avoid.

Also, if a guy acts like a 7 year old when he's with you, you are set with a guy that likes you a lot. Men are children and will never change. If your man doesn't act like a kid with you, something's wrong.


True. doh.gif
Arix2006-04-29 22:22:59
QUOTE
Most girls think they are fat. If I say I am fat, don’t just say that I’m not. Tell me that I’m the most gorgeous woman you have ever seen and that those skinny twigs have nothing on me.


girls these days are too damn skinny. Me, I like women who look like they've had a decent meal in the last few days. You know, healthy-looking. I don't like to see their ribs when they wear a swimsuit. You skinny twig girls out there that think you're too fat and obsess about it to the point that you become anorexic or bulimic or something, that's not good. Bottom line: eat something once in awhile. Don't have to pig out, just don't starve yourself. (end rant)
Aiakon2006-04-29 22:47:41
damn right, Arix.
Arix2006-04-29 22:57:57
I'm not trying to offend anyone, it's just that I see all these skinny wannabe models wandering around looking like they haven't eaten in a long time, and I just want to buy them a sandwich or some chicken or something
Narses2006-04-29 23:00:51
" I like big butts and I cannot lie, you other brothers can't deny! when a girl walks in with an ity biddy waist, I get sick it's like a toothpick!".

Anyways... I had to comment on that is all.

Now just for the record, I think that both sets of rules are stupid, I agree with neither and I am quite tired of people who feel "generous" enough to share these so called insights.

cheeeeers
Unknown2006-04-29 23:13:34
Edit. why bother. Joli I am just glad not every girl thinks like you thas all.
Unknown2006-04-29 23:23:54
I don't know why so many women think are whole existence is bent on pleasing them. Not -should- be pleasing them, but that we actually are trying to please them and that we think that that is our only ( or at least our most important ) goal. They think that we are trying but failing horribly, when infact 99.9999% don't give a shit either way.

So they come up with these 'cute' little list to 'educate' them on how to please them and make them feel good.

As my good friend once said things like this make me fell like " Visit ing my right hand ".
Yrael2006-04-30 00:04:27
QUOTE(Amaru @ Apr 30 2006, 04:50 AM) 283710

I've summed this up in language men will understand. In bold:

1. We like it when you notice small changes in our appearance. Hearing “Are you wearing new eye shadow? It looks nice,” or “You look cute in the new outfit,” makes our day so much better. (Women are vain)

2. Most girls think they are fat. If I say I am fat, don’t just say that I’m not. Tell me that I’m the most gorgeous woman you have ever seen and that those skinny twigs have nothing on me. (Women are vain)

3. Women like compliments. Every day. Not just once a week or month. Even if it is just saying that we look nice we still like to hear it. (Women are vain)

4. We don’t like secrets. At all. If you are doing something that you won’t let us know about then it is automatically something suspicious and we will create the worst scenario in our mind until we find out what it is.(Women are paranoid)

5. Women don’t like men that chew with their mouths open or talk while eating. It is disgusting. Please don’t do it. We would rather their be silence than to have to attempt to listen while you are eating a piece of steak. (this isn't just women, so ignore it)

6. Getting the busy signal over and over makes us want to kill you. Get call waiting, damn you. The same goes for letting the phone ring on and on and on before picking up. (Women are impatient)

7. Don’t make fun of our flaws. If we are afraid of spiders and being out alone, don’t call us a weenie or a pansy or you might find a large fake snake on your pillow one night. (Women can't take a joke)

8. Women like to be around their men. Doing anything at all. Just going out to eat or going to a movie or even doing physical labor. We just want to spend our time with the people that we like. (I edited this one)

9. If we refuse to look at you, something is wrong. If we don’t speak to you, something is wrong. If we get up and walk away, something is wrong. So sitting there and pretending like something is not wrong is not the best option. (Women expect you to care if they're in a mood again)

10. There are moments when we hate you and love you at the same time. We may get upset but that doesn’t mean that the relationship is over, so don’t act like it is just because we flip out. That will make us flip out more and make the situation worse. (Women are, basically, impossible and incomprehendable)


I love you.

Hey, while we're being sexist mental deficients and wondering why this is in the funnies, I'd like to note that I can play too.

Ten things men wish women knew:

1) If you feel fat, don't ask us. Get your arse down to the gym.

2) We don't know how that looks on you, and we don't care as long as you don't look like Queen Elizabeth II wearing mauve curtains and a flowerpot.

3) Anything said 6-8 months ago in an argument is inadmissable, all comments become null and void after 7 days.

4) We.
Are.
Not.
Mindreaders.

5) Saying "Fine" and "Nothing" are usually the best way to get into an argument. Also expecting us to know what we've done wrong by your own twisted scale of justice is wrong. See 4.

6) "Five minutes" means "until the next ad".

7) Potential energy is on your side when it comes to the toilet bowl lid.

8) We don't care about your "feminine" problems. Stop the descriptions. For the love of god.

9) Your girlfriends are not our "best friends".

10) Just because we glanced in the general direction of another continent a woman may or may not be standing on, we are not "checking her out".

See? I can copy and paste too.
Yrael2006-04-30 00:18:14
You know, I can't shake the feeling this was meant to turn into a "Men, read and obey! Girls, isn't it funny what they don't know? Oh, yeah! We're all women TOGETHER, so let's all have a big group hug and laugh at those silly hairy men! We're OBVIOUSLY so much better than they are." post. Read out in a valley girl voice and accent, with lots of head and hand movements. Or an attempt to, which thankfully doesn't work due to the fact that noone other than Joli seems to think like that.

Twit.
Verithrax2006-04-30 00:21:15
Oh, and about eyeshade, forget it. We couldn't care less about eyeshade. in fact, the entire cosmetics industry is a filthy lie and the only men who give a damn about what colours you smear on your face are the kind of men who aren't keen on women anyway. Seriously. clean up your face. We can't tell the difference between you, and you with some weird and foul-tasting ink on your face.
Arix2006-04-30 00:36:34
ugh, I hate it when women wear too much makeup. Most girls I know can get away with just lip gloss. in fact, my last girlfriend used Dr. Pepper flavored lip gloss. mmmmm....
Xavius2006-04-30 02:37:11
If you're trying to figure out "men" or "women" with checklists, you've already failed. Men and women are both people. Individual men and women have personalities, and these personalities go a lot farther in determining what they do and don't like than any gender stereotype. The only real impact gender has on a person is what society expects out of that person. There is no gender-based hivemind. If you're going to base your reactions to half of humanity on what society expects out of someone...well, you deserve every ounce of loneliness you get.
Yrael2006-04-30 02:50:04
QUOTE(Xavius @ Apr 30 2006, 12:37 PM) 283903

There is no gender-based hivemind.


FOR THE SWARM.
Acrune2006-04-30 03:02:20
Bah, this thread used to be amusing. Now its gone mean. sad.gif
Joli2006-04-30 03:06:10
Because I refuse to fuel this anymore, my boyfriend has a message for all the men that decided to crawl out and post:

Wow guys, thanks for setting the male gender back 500 years.

You guys take crap way too seriously. She wrote this after reading Esquire's half dozen versions of this, which is a whole lot worse than what she wrote.

And about me noticing my girlfriend's eyeshadow.. censor.gif yourself, Narsrim. I'm not gay. You only wish I was.
Yrael2006-04-30 03:10:49
..why would he want you to be gay?