Quotes 4

by Terentia

Back to The Funnies.

Unknown2008-08-03 17:03:28
QUOTE(Shaddus Mes @ Aug 3 2008, 12:41 PM) 540481
Fain, of the Red Masque says, "You wish to join the marital wing of My order?"

From behind His mask, Fain's eyes burn with a malignant humour.

You say, "Yes, Lord. It has ever been so, since I first joined Your Order."

Fain, of the Red Masque says, "The martial, not the marital."

You cough softly.

You say, "Of course, Lord."


Violence and marriage? Shaddus! You wife beater! whatthe.gif
Shaddus2008-08-03 17:08:02
QUOTE(Mirin-Carvier @ Aug 3 2008, 12:03 PM) 540485
Violence and marriage? Shaddus! You wife beater! whatthe.gif

You've never met Kanika, she's cut my arms off before during foreplay wink.gif

Besides, Lord Fain DOES favour the waltz.. nothing wrong with a bit of sex and violins.
Shaddus2008-08-03 18:03:59
On another note.. speaking with a novice about Celestians...

Sohei Revan n'Kylbar, General of the Blades says, "The woman are scowling and unapproachable to the suave, confident Taint."
Ardmore2008-08-03 20:51:32
QUOTE
Dancing and twirling, an enormous, ridiculously pink elephant turns to you, offering you a cup of tea.
...Haven't seen that one before!

QUOTE
You gibber and scream about being devoured, as several clowns approach you with eating utensils in hand.
That one either! This is my lucky day!
Unknown2008-08-03 23:14:36
Not funny, but I find this really odd.

QUOTE
(Newbie): Talinas says, "Is there a command I can use to get information on
another player?"
(Newbie): Lendren says, "Try HONORS ."

(Newbie): Talinas says, "Thanks!"

honors talinas

Talinas (Male Loboshigaru).
He is 127 years old, having been born on the 3rd of Estar, 86 years after the
Coming of Estarra.
He is unranked in Lusternia.
He is an extremely credible character.
He is a Vagrant in the Fellowship of Explorers.
He is a graduate of the Ancestral Glade of the Moonharts.
He is considered to be approximately 605% of your might.
He is not currently active in any family.


How does someone miss something that basic?
Shaddus2008-08-03 23:21:15
Talinas (Male Loboshigaru).
He is 127 years old, having been born on the 3rd of Estar, 86 years after the
Coming of Estarra.
He is unranked in Lusternia.
He is an extremely credible character.
He is a Vagrant in the Fellowship of Explorers.
He is a graduate of the Ancestral Glade of the Moonharts.
He is considered to be approximately 25% of your might.
He is not currently active in any family.

Wait.. who ARE you?
Unknown2008-08-03 23:28:35
QUOTE

With a focused look, Pharamon strikes at Hyde with a golden sun flail. Pharamon
crushes his left thigh bone which shatters under the force of the blow.
Horror overcomes Hyde's face as his body stiffens into paralysis.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe||Mana: 75|

With a focused look, Pharamon strikes at Hyde with a golden sun flail. With an
elegant stroke, Pharamon crushes his left leg, knocking him to the ground.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|

With a focused look, Jasato strikes at Hyde with a dull iron katana. Jasato
strikes the tendon above his left heel, making him scream as it's completely
severed.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
{* New Target: (hyde) *}

A beatific cherub shoots a bolt of blinding light at Hyde.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|

With a look of agony on his face, Hyde manages to writhe himself free of that
which impaled him.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
maneuver perform knock left hyde
maneuver perform knock left hyde
You execute the Knock maneuver: SMASH LEFT HYDE.
Swinging a golden sun flail in an underhand arc, you strike at Hyde. You smash
him hard in the belly, making him double over and turn purple.
The blow continues into Hyde's body, causing a sickening cracking and mashing
sound. A terrible rictus of pain twists his features for a moment, vanishing
suddenly as he falls, lifeless, to the ground.
You have slain Hyde.qsc
Your karma falls in response to your deeds.qsc
Hyde drops the corpse of a divine deva.
Hyde drops the corpse of a seraphic angel.
Hyde drops the corpse of a seraphic angel.
Kill Tracker for Hyde: Kills {1} Deaths {}
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elxkb<>-|Safe|
You execute the Knock maneuver: SMASH LEFT HYDE.
{{{ hyde is not here }}}
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elxkb<>-|Safe|
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elxkb<>-|Safe|
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elxkb<>-|Safe|
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elxkb<>-|Safe|
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elxkb<>-|Safe|

{{{ Right Arm Recovered }}}

{{{ ALL BALANCE IS RECOVERED }}}
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
I don't see that item.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
I don't see that item.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
I see no "hyde" to take.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
You scoop up the corpse of Hyde.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
You scoop up the corpse of a divine deva.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
You scoop up the corpse of a seraphic angel.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
You scoop up the corpse of a seraphic angel.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|

(Celest): Kialkarkea (from the Prime Material Plane) says, "Hail CElest...wow."
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|

Snaithy's mouth turns up as his face breaks into a smile.
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|
say neat!
You say, "Neat!"
3795h, 3825m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe||Mana: -75|

Lord General Snaithy Dekoven, Elder of the Black Lion says, "Good work."
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe||Mana: 75|

(Celest): You say, "Hi hunny."


*innocent*

turns out, the wow wasn't for me... cry.gif


QUOTE
Kialkarkea tells you, "How's my Bella Bells?"
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|

You tell Ecclesiar Kialkarkea Diodorus, "What did you say Whoa for?"
3795h, 3900m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe|

Kialkarkea tells you, "Lots of Celestines around!"
3795h, 3825m, 3900e, 10p, elrxkb<>-|Safe||Mana: -75|
Shaddus2008-08-04 00:58:06
A skeleton exclaims, "Arr! Me poop deck needs swabbing!"

I know what it meant, but still whatthe.gif
Jasato2008-08-04 03:20:28
You say, "3 Demi's, two of them Avatars, one censor.gif and another slow minded guy with legs faster then his mouth..."

A beatific cherub somersaults in the air and giggles.

You say, "See, the cherub thought I was funny."
Unknown2008-08-04 13:49:14
QUOTE
***********************************
Citizen Rank Position CT
Kialkarkea Nobleman On
Currently, there is 1 Citizen on this Plane and 0 on other Planes.

The whole city to myself! Naked Time!!
Unknown2008-08-04 15:25:36
I'm walking in the City today, and I notice this:

QUOTE
On Nautilus Pompilus street, near the non-merian quarter.
A salubrious warmth envelops your surroundings as ivory ribbons of light flare
in and out of existence, flowing in from a healing shrine of Eventru nearby.
This location is flooded with shallow, crystal clear water. The bright sun
shines down, blanketing you with its life-giving warmth. Glowing on a nearby
wall is script that reads, "VOTE FOR FREE BOOZE, VOTE TWILXO!" A statue of
Methrenton stands here, memorializing his noble spirit.
You see exits leading southeast and west.


Made me laugh.

QUOTE
The whole city to myself! Naked Time!!
I had the guild to myself earlier. The result was a little different.

QUOTE
*******************************************************
Guildmember Rank Position GT GNT CGT
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Messara 1 On On On
*******************************************************************************
Currently, there is 1 member on this Plane and 0 on other Planes.

(Celestines): You say, "Whole guild to myself, whoo!"
(Celestines): Eventru says, "Oh reaally?"
Unknown2008-08-04 22:09:15
QUOTE
The shimmering form of a giggling cherub paces the skies above New Celest, before rearranging clouds to spell out the
words, 'Vote for Twilxo'. With a playful giggle it flies back several yards to admire its work.

A horrified gasp escapes the giggling cherub's lips, before adding the words 'DO NOT' before the previous inscription.

A terrified squeal erupts from the dimunitive cherub, which turns to flee before the brilliant form of an obviously
upset Eventru, who chases the angelic figure across the skies of New Celest, before descending into the city.


Would love to know the details biggrin.gif
Xenthos2008-08-04 22:20:41
QUOTE(shadow @ Aug 4 2008, 06:09 PM) 540917
Would love to know the details biggrin.gif

Sounds like the next step in the graffiti-like "Vote for Twilxo" illusions scrawled on walls. And (what looks like) a unique entrance message.
Aison2008-08-05 00:09:36
QUOTE(shadow @ Aug 4 2008, 03:09 PM) 540917
Would love to know the details biggrin.gif



Okay.


CODE
CELEST NEWS #2735 Date: 8/4/2008 at 12:19
From: Verse Master Twilxo
To  : Everyone
Subj: VOTE FOR ME!
Hail, oh glorious and thankfully democratic city!

It is I, Twilxo, the Master of Verse, super-harmonist-guy of the Cantors, and, with luck and your support, the next glorious prince of Celest!

For too long we have been at the whim of boring old codgers with swords, sticks, shiny things and large amounts of water. They have given us the politics of working for things, of not having fun and drinking and smoking slightly hallucinogenic substances. But NO MORE! I am a leader, a man of the people! I shall fight the evil oppressors and make this city truly the city of lights (party lights, that is) again!

Now, for those things the OC (old codgers) call 'platforms'. I prefer to call them "platYOURms", as they should be! one; A party every month from the city coffers, with alchohol from the finest brewers in the land two; I will have created an official headress for the entire Star Council, consisting of buckets with gold-wire halos attached three; To make Glomboring more interesting, I shall send novices with the illusion skill to create sparkles throughout their darkened boughs four; To combat Magnagora, I propose an aerial dropping of perfume across their lands, so that the smell of taint shall forever be gone! I have many more platYOURms, just come and ask me about them, and remember;

A VOTE FOR TWILXO IS A VOTE FOR DEBAUCHERY!!

Penned by my hand on the 13th of Urlachmar, in the year 213 CE.


While reading it, I had the urge to barf and laugh at the same time.

'BLLLARRGHHHHAHAHAHAHAHA'.
Unknown2008-08-05 01:41:33
QUOTE
Rhaena says, "Exeryte reaches out and ruffles your hair, bits of poultry and greese matting your hair from his thick sasauge fingers. He leans back wheezing, his mouth going slack as spittle runs down his chin, which heaves up and down heavily with each laboured breath."

Rhaena says, "You watch in amazement and disgust as Exeryte lifts his blubber ladden arm to his face to shove more greasy chicken into his horrible maw. His rubbery lips, glistening red with grease like two thick worms work the meat to a desirable softness before he swallows. With a groan of frustration he notices a chunk of meat on his chin, and runs his grotesque
tongue over the rolls of his face, trying vainly to reach the errant piece of poultry."


In the forest of the beautiful, the disgustingly fat must fend for themselves.
Crylia2008-08-05 02:36:07
QUOTE(Aison @ Aug 4 2008, 07:09 PM) 540951
CODE
CELEST NEWS #2735 Date: 8/4/2008 at 12:19
From: Verse Master Twilxo
To  : Everyone
Subj: VOTE FOR ME!
Hail, oh glorious and thankfully democratic city!

It is I, Twilxo, the Master of Verse, super-harmonist-guy of the Cantors, and, with luck and your support, the next glorious prince of Celest!

For too long we have been at the whim of boring old codgers with swords, sticks, shiny things and large amounts of water. They have given us the politics of working for things, of not having fun and drinking and smoking slightly hallucinogenic substances. But NO MORE! I am a leader, a man of the people! I shall fight the evil oppressors and make this city truly the city of lights (party lights, that is) again!

Now, for those things the OC (old codgers) call 'platforms'. I prefer to call them "platYOURms", as they should be! one; A party every month from the city coffers, with alchohol from the finest brewers in the land two; I will have created an official headress for the entire Star Council, consisting of buckets with gold-wire halos attached three; To make Glomboring more interesting, I shall send novices with the illusion skill to create sparkles throughout their darkened boughs four; To combat Magnagora, I propose an aerial dropping of perfume across their lands, so that the smell of taint shall forever be gone! I have many more platYOURms, just come and ask me about them, and remember;

A VOTE FOR TWILXO IS A VOTE FOR DEBAUCHERY!!

Penned by my hand on the 13th of Urlachmar, in the year 213 CE.


I'd totally vote for that guy.
Unknown2008-08-05 05:04:00
*ninja edit*
Aison2008-08-05 06:08:04
Hence why you are not a citizen of Celest.
Furien2008-08-05 06:29:54
Twilxo is running for Prince? Is he Tiax, or something? It looks like he's going to transform Celest into the CIJ/Jesters.

Wait, that's actually very fitting. Everyone likes to get drunk and raid the Jester guildhall to be pricks, and they do that all the time with Celest, too. Interesting.
Bhiele2008-08-05 13:05:15
A personal journal tells you, "Do you remember my mother?"


When I asked if I was insane I got...

(Glomdoring): Viravain says, "That would be a sign of your insanity, yes."

pfft.gif Bhiele has been declared insane by the Goddess, and is now free to pursue marriage with the Thorn Beast.


ETA~~ Durh, I didn't know we were all crazy that had been on Astral.