Granted, however, they would all making Enlgish high-fiving at the grammar.

Granted, but they don't make their wishes in this thread.

I wish that I hadn't failed so terribly much at grammar in that post.

Granted, but from now on, every time you open your mouth to speak, all that comes out is babble and gobbledygook.

I wish I could just...be with my mate...

-gulps- I feel like an absolute jerk for this.

Granted, but you find out that you can't stand their family (who are annoyingly often around) and so they're forced to chose between you and their family.

I wish for my college to get back to me finally.

Granted, but you are deferred.

I wish that I had more wishes.

Granted, all of them are corrupted and it ends up being horrible for you.

I wish I had something to eat.

Granted, but you get airborne botulism in it, with a delay of 1 year before symptoms show. Everything is alright. You visit your family and friends, who are infected and infect in turn. One year from now the symptoms manifest. It's already too late to intervene, to stop the apocalypse. With frightening speed, starting from your location, people begin to die. Entire cities are reduced to corpse-ridden ghost towns. Pets resort to eating their owners, trapped inside the houses that once gave them shelter. Slowly, they begin to die off too, as food supplies within the houses dwindle. Some survive by breaking free. Some humans survive, hidden in remote corners of the world. It matters not, the contagion remains within the shattered necropoli of what was once a bustling civilization. Your legacy is one that will never be remembered, not because of the lack of impact, but because no one remains that knows how, or why the human race was so devastated. The only evidence, a pot of canned baked beans long since having rotted away...

I wish I was less crazy.

Granted, but you're mentally challenged.

I wish I could teleport.

Granted, except you get splinched in a wall and there's no Hermione to save you.

I wish I was a decent public speaker.

Granted, but you pee yourself every time.

I wish you would edit that post to remove the Harry Potter reference.

Granted, but now it's Twilight reference.

I wish that someone would give me an idea for hyperactive.

Granted. It's perfect to the point where it not only balances Bards and Monks, but also balances PvP.
AND LUSTERNIA AS A WHOLE.
It then dies in the envoy process.

I wish the bloody laundromat wasn't so far away.

Granted, but you have to listen to people having sex against the laundry machine every night.

I wish that I didn't have to go away this weekend.

Granted, you have to away forever.

I wish for world peace.

Granted. World peace is achieved by all of existence succumbing to heat death.

I wish I could be academically productive.

Granted, but you can never have fun again.

I wish I could be academically destructive.

Granted, but you probably shouldn't have wished for that with your area of study.

I wish I knew what was up with the weird texture I noticed under the skin of my thumb when I woke up. At first I thought it was just peely dry skin, then I realized it was something under my skin.

Granted, but you now find out that your thumb is pregnant(and in labor).

I wish I would've pursued my percussionist hobbies. =\\

Granted. As a result, your hearing is shot, you're strung out, and everyone wants you to get back together and put another album out.

Granted, your lack of a wish made it so everything bad that you can and cannot imagine happens to you.

I wish the wishgranter becomes a My Littlle Pony, complete with cutie mark.