Once upon a fairy tale,
as legends often say;
there comes a tale of daring-do
that I shall now relate.

First we meet our heroine,
so innocent and pure:
(we don't discuss the notches
on her swinging bedroom door).

Her hair like golden sunlight
blue ocean in her eye.
(Her voice as flocks of peacocks,
startled to full cry).

Her home it was in Paavik,
bourgeois noble was she.
(though often she was found with
the shepherd and his sheep).

Our tale begins one summer's eve
the kitties raid again.
(She was howe'er distracted
dancing naked in the rain).

The chieftain saw her antics,
and realized her name.
To capture one such as her
would gain him lots of fame.

His warriors gathered round her
they thought her easy prey
Mistake: they could not e'er forget
this nightmare of a day.

She screamed in sheerest fury,
two slain with just her voice.
Another died in horror at
The words she used; so choice.

A pause; a breath; a wondering eye,
Yet courage pushed them forth.
The chieftain's roar rang clear and loud
reminding of her worth.

Again they gathered closer,
pure fury in their eyes.
Weapons readied, shields held high;
the kits prepared to die.

Yet enter now our hero,
and time it seemed to stop.
For who did sally forth to save her;
The shepherd oh so hot.

His crook he swung with frightful ease
his muscles large and brawny.
Madness filled his muddy eye
as he cried out for his "lani".

He waded in with vengeful cries,
Aslarans gaped in shock.
For following in rank and file,
was all his faithful flock.

The first did fall with horrid cries,
the sheep did bowl him over.
When found upon the battle's end
Twas suited but for clover.

The second warrior stood his ground
his claws so sharp and deadly.
They trampled him under their hooves
a brittle, snapping medley.

The pride they turned to run away,
abandoning their chieftain.
He stood his ground, a mighty kit
(though yes his knees were shakin).

The flock they turned and charged him,
led by their strongest ewe.
A baa, a crunch, they mowed him down,
to cover him in ... ewwwww.

And like all those good fairy tales,
the moral's plain to see.
Never try to hurt the girl
that's sleeping with the sheep.