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Public News Post #1661

An apology

Written by: Preston D'Varden, The Indefatigable
Date: Saturday, November 22nd, 2014
Addressed to: Everyone


To the people of Celest, most particularly the Paladin's Guild and the
Order of Goddess Terentia.
I address you a rogue, set in his place by his own mistakes who cannot
come apart from the light. I feared at once, realizing the nature of
myself growing into change that there was some misunderstanding of the
integrity of my heart concerning my removal from the city , the guild
and the order as well as being enemied for some time: These are
devestating events and duely so as I earned the weight of every
reprimand. The fact I can now see that and have such gratitude for being
capable of learning allows me to assure you that justice was done, my
behavior was inexcusable. I have great remorse for shaming the paladins,
the light and the city as I have, for betraying the guidance of my
superiors in favor of passionate whims and not once making it easy on my
brothers to bear with me. The insufferable arrogance of my ego was
shattered when I was removed, proving to my pride that a man is never so
much as he gloats but only as he has done and in my case, I believe the
proverb "A fool is known by his multitude of words" very much applied to
me. In some ways perhaps it still does, for even as I write I am
reflecting upon myself to be certain I speak with sincerity in my
elaboration rather than simply dragging a purple-prose paintbrush on the
canvas of which is an intention to seek forgiveness, to apply for mercy
and to appeal to the light which has not abandoned me, but I feel has
continued to guide me since I have been removed: a light which keeps me
from the southern alliance and in duty, doing all I can for those who I
am still not yet worthy of. This charity and remote, yet proactive
routine is my way of showing that my nature is not the angst and the ego
of my younger self, but that my nature is as the knight who pledges
himself by oath only once, for eternity. I would reconcile myself with
the good people, with the order, the Paladins, the city and I have
accepted that journey could be a great amount of time or even never
come. Somehow this does not discomfort me and I pray you all understand
when I say it is a privelege even to be the exile assisting such noble
and goodly people in their war against the taint, unwanted perhaps,
un-needed, perhaps, but unable to help himself from fighting for the
side he knows is right. The people treated me well, they taught me
wisdoms and encouraged me. Lady Kelly, Lord Bandeon gave me more chances
than I realized and even in the midst of my worst verbal rampage yet,
Lady Lyala tried with Lady Raziela's own soothe to snuff out my childish
rage - something that I have come to do for myself and in repetition has
only occasionally become necessary - I regret not listening and taking
for granted the efforts made to teach me before things became too much.
I am older and different now, I persist as the reconciler. By mercy may
I be forgiven, wisdom light the way to redemption and courage clear the
path, that I may forge myself anew, my weaknesses - those accursed flaws
which kept me from my home. What is wrong can be made right again, I
will be evidence of it and in that I believe is vindication.

Always on call,
Preston D'Varden

Penned by my hand on the 17th of Klangiary, in the year 398 CE.


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