Lord Eventru!

Praise be Your name, Eventru.

The children hear Your name and quickly eat their greens and intestines.
They run in fear clutching their pants in fear of You and Yours.

Praise be Eventru, the Golden Lord!

By Your guiding light I do not stub my toes in the dark of night.
Your bright and shining face always makes me glad to be alive, and
easily killed.

Praise Eventru!

The quill takes off, writing what lies in my darkest of hearts, the ones
hidden behind the bookshelf in my manse.

Eventru, the Golden Lord, the angels sing Your praises, much as my voice
does now. I presume it is by Your will as well. Normally I reserve my
voice for making sexual innuendo in an attempt to get people to buy my
food. I'm glad You want such a voice singing Your praises. To each His
own I suppose.

The angels sing Your praises. I am saddened to see that they no longer
sing of Elohora and the Light. Ingrates! Celest has turned to follow a
tinny bastard of a god who skips around in a loincloth. Last time I did
that I got in such trouble. Then again, apparently I'm not as well
endowed as Eventru, according to Him.

Perhaps that is why He has a tendancy to strike first and not bother
speaking. Just a zap and a question. Eventru, was it good for You too?

Praise be to Eventru!

I am pleased to note that many people who follow You obey Your readily
apparant precepts. Bend them over with raw power and take what they
want.

The concept of fighting with words seems to be lacking amoungst Yours,
dear Lord. Lord Eventru, they seem to lack Your legendary wit! I pray
most humbly to whatever damned gods will listen to my humble prayers
that Yours learn quickly how to string words and thoughts and spin
coherent defenses as You have so often proven to the Basin at large.

Eventru, oh Eventru, how I love You so. Even though I prefer the women,
I am suddenly struck by Your power and feel the need for You. Even
though most decent people consider this a most offensive deed. Eventru,
"no" means "no."

Eventru! Praise be to the Golden Lord of Celest. May Celest bow and
kneel before Your shrines. May they forget the Light. If they are so
easily swayed by an oiled chest, loin cloth, and shining light, they do
not deserve to be considered worthy enemies.

That they would so easily cast aside their precepts, the very heart of
their city! The gall of such...vermin. I had thought better of my former
city.

Celest! Why have you forsaken the Light? Where is Raziela? Where is
Shakiniel? Where is Japhiel? Where is Elohora?

Bound by Glorious Shining Manifestation of Maniless, pure sex appeal,
and a walking slab of muscle. I'm certain Celest follows Him for His
teachings, not that He's there and willing to throw a few bolts of
lightning across the sky. I am overjoyed by the corruption a few abs and
the slaughter of people who really can't defend themselves against a God
can cause.

Praise Eventru!

Praise that Glorious Golden Bastard in the Sky because His Divine magics
force me to!

Praise be to Eventru.

Praise be to the corruption of Celest.

-Jigan

Penned by my hand on the 15th of Juliary, in the year 229 CE.