To the Cattle of the Basin,
With One Specific Kine in Mind,

I know that this is hard for you to accept, but I do not return your
affections. Your cowish countenance fills me not with deep and forbidden
romance as you have mistakenly assumed, but rather with a sense of
disappointment and embarassment. Under no circumstances do I wish to be
sealed away in a room with you by telekinetic barriers, nor to find a
nice cave somewhere and "make out". The thought fills me with dread and
disgust. I have no desire to have you visit me at home, nor at the
Gossip. Your love letters, each and every one, have been burned,
unopened. I ask that you cease this foolish crush that you seem to have
upon me, and that you find out a nice young heifer to wed.

-Without love, but certainly with courtesty,
Kalas Iytha

Penned by my hand on the 1st of Klangiary, in the year 292 CE.